Occasionally, amid explorations of obsession and madness, horror and satire, existentialism and human frailty… You just need to tell a ridiculous tall tale or two to keep yourself amused. Nothing could be even slightly problematic about that could it…

Well…

Here is the thing, while this is nothing more than a tall tale, and wasn’t problematic to any great degree at the time when our Dear Edgar wrote this, reading it now with modern eyes can throw up the odd,,, lets call them niggles. And as much as I am a firm believer that if you read something you should read it in full knowledge that it is ‘of its time’, those niggles still bears a modicum of examination, not least because the niggles in this case are more directly reflective of dear Edgar himself.

In this tall tale our narrator, who never supplies us with his name, seeks permission from his grand uncle Rumgudgeon to marry the young and beautiful Kate, his grand uncles other ward. The grand uncle agrees with but one stipulation. The narrator can not marry the girl, who is his second cousin insists to the narrator that:-

You shall have Kate and her plum when three Sundays come together in a week — but not till then… …I am a man of my word. 

Okay, so ‘niggles’

Firstly the narrator wants to marry his cousin. Now it should be noted she is desirous of this too, and marrying your second cousin was not that unusual in the mid 1800’s. Half the royal families of Europe were related to each other in that way for a start, but still to the modern reader…

Secondly there is the matter of ‘her plum’ now I am not entirely sure what ‘her plum’ refers to in this context, only that it is mentions several times, and the grand uncle is some what desirous of her plum too, apparently…

Then there is another matter, the narrator has ‘seen his fifth Olympiad’ which is to say he is twenty as the Olympics’ are every four years. An oddly anarchic term in the 1840’s given the modern Olympics did not arise for another fifty plus years. His cousin Kate however is only fourteen. Now again this was not an issue in 1840’s America. this is not to say it was common, but it wasn’t uncommon or illegal to marry at that age, with a parents or guardians consent.

When he was twenty-six Poe married his own cousin Virginia Clemm officially in 1836 when she was fourteen. They obtained a marriage license when she was only thirteen in the neighboring state. I am well aware to our modern eyes this seems a whole heap of wrong. It would also be illegal now in the very states where it was legal then. I have also had people tell me they don’t read Poe now because to there mind he was a pedophile. Which were he trying to marry a fourteen year old today he would certainly be. And there is nothing wrong with their view.

That said, transposing the morality of today on to the past is something of a foolish endeavor and if your going to do so you should do so utterly, so you should probably stop reading Shakespeare as well. You have to take these things in context. Poe married Virginia legally with the consent (admittedly begrudgingly given ) of her parents. They went on to have a happy marriage. If you don’t wish to read Poe now because the morality of his day differs from your own I commend your integrity, I just don’t think your reasons for doing so are right.

More importantly I don’t think you should tell me, or anyone else, not to read Poe because his 1800’s morality is not your own 2000’s morality. This has happened several times… This is problematic because it is of it time, it was not problematic in its time. which is the point. If you want to know the difference, read some Lovecraft, there was a man who was problematic for his time…

But back to this ridiculous tall tale.

It is Kate, the would be bride, who comes up with a somewhat contrived solution to the three Sundays in a single week conundrum, with the help of a couple of navel offices who have circumnavigated the globe in opposite directions, both have crossed the international date line, so one is technically a day behind, and one technically a day ahead. So for the two sailors and the couple three consecutive days are effectively ‘Sunday’.

The uncle keeps to his word, and the couple marry… hussar.

Its a tall tale, its quite funny because of the way its written, but its nothing more than that short , funny , clever and written to make its reader smile.

THREE AMUSED RAVENS WHO SAW THE JOKE COMING BUT LAUGHED ANYWAY

SHOULD YOU READ IT: It is a perfect example of a tall tale, it is written to a punch line and writing to be funny in the tell as well as the end. As a writer it is interesting, as a reader merely amusing. But it is certainly amusing.

SHOULD YOU NOT READ IT: If you can not read this through the filter of the morality of its time, then you should not read it. Likewise if you can not separate writer and story. As I said earlier this is problematic because of its time, it was not problematic in its time. which is the point.

Bluffers fact: Crossing the international date line does not in fact change the day and the world keeps spinning, the entire premise of the story is wrong in that regard. As was Jules Verne when he used that plot device to have Phileas Fogg win his bet in around the world in 80 days…